Alexis is seriously a tough cookie--she's got thick skin--a non destructible membrane. And even when things get a little tough, and when she's not exactly on easy street, she still keeps her head up high.
It also helps when she is surrounded by people who love and care for her--and even those from afar. It helps when she sees family and friends on skype; it helps when friends post a thougtful note on her facebook wall or in a private message; it helps when she knows how many people, even strangers, are on her side. It especially helps that her close friends have started to fly all the way across the world to be with her. It doesn't matter to them that they are in Israel, it doesn't matter to them that when they visit with Alexis they have to wear a mask, it doesn't matter. One of them didn't even think to bring a bathing suit because her only plan was to come and be here with Alexis. Nothing really matters except seeing Alexis with a smile on her face. And even when things get a little tougher, she's still smiling and giggling.
Team Alexis is mighty and we can feel it all the way over here in Israel and it helps.
Tuesday, October 26, 2010
Monday, October 25, 2010
an optimistic genius
Alexis and Debbie arrived--I've been consumed by it all (in a healthy way) and happy to be part of it. Alexis and I have really gotten close and I'm happy and grateful for the time we have shared--albeit under shitty circumstances.
We (Alexis and I) are similar in a lot of ways--both of us are connected and loved by a lot of people-- we tend to order either the most intriguing or expensive dish on the menu, have a similar palette and like pretty things.
We are also pretty strong--in a sweet, don't want or have time for your bullshit kind of way--her probably more so than I. The only difference is that I don't have this cancer thing that she does-- but, it doesn't seem to be in her way-- I mean, at least for someone with cancer it doesn't--together, we forget she has it--together, while enjoying delicious cakes, chocolate or popcorn with zathar, we forget she has it--and then, when she remembers why she is in Israel, it hits her, bites her in the ass, stings for a bit and then, we forget again.
She makes cancer look easy--and in no WAY am I knocking the extreme difficulties others face when they look eye to eye with the disease-- but she makes it seem that way--she brushes it off her shoulders and continues onward. Faces the challenges with a smile. Always.
We have no clue what these treatments will bring us, but its impossible to not be optimistic--she's an optimistic genius and it's contagious.
Saturday, October 23, 2010
someone pinch me
As i was sitting in the hospital room with Alexis today, it hit me again that this whole experience does not seem real.
We were in the middle of a conversation/ her nurse, who, for the record is incredible was checking her pressure, I all of a sudden just said, this still doesn't feel real.
seriously, Alexis is in Israel because she needed a transplant because she relapsed? What?
We were in the middle of a conversation/ her nurse, who, for the record is incredible was checking her pressure, I all of a sudden just said, this still doesn't feel real.
seriously, Alexis is in Israel because she needed a transplant because she relapsed? What?
Friday, October 22, 2010
lions and tigers and hospital mates oh my!
again, despite everything, which still doesn't even feel real considering the circumstances, this has been quite the adventure.
Last night, Alexis and I had a slumber party in her hospital room, however, we did not think we would end up on a safari.
A part from watching Don't mess with Zohan, just to keep the Israel theme alive, we also took a trip to the zoo...and by zoo, we mean our neighbour's snoring was so loud and vicious that if felt like we were in a lion's den.
Each time she would snore, Alexis crumpled her massive water bottle in hope that her snoring would stop. Whether it was Alexis saying "stop snoring" in her sweet voice or me trying to behaviorally condition her subconsciously, it wouldn't end.
Between giggling and the crackling, we eventually passed out, thanks to our little friend Advian...or so we think that's what we were given. Gd bless this country. Always a solution to everything!
Last night, Alexis and I had a slumber party in her hospital room, however, we did not think we would end up on a safari.
A part from watching Don't mess with Zohan, just to keep the Israel theme alive, we also took a trip to the zoo...and by zoo, we mean our neighbour's snoring was so loud and vicious that if felt like we were in a lion's den.
Each time she would snore, Alexis crumpled her massive water bottle in hope that her snoring would stop. Whether it was Alexis saying "stop snoring" in her sweet voice or me trying to behaviorally condition her subconsciously, it wouldn't end.
Between giggling and the crackling, we eventually passed out, thanks to our little friend Advian...or so we think that's what we were given. Gd bless this country. Always a solution to everything!
Wednesday, October 20, 2010
b'sheretisms
Everything happens for a reason. At least believing in that helps make sense out of life anyhow. And if we need to make sense of how we got to a particular place or time, this helps.
I wasn't even suppose to be in Israel. In fact, the only real reason why I came here was because one of my best friends decided to move her February Toronto wedding to August in Israel. I was only suppose to stay for 3 weeks.
I extended my trip for an extra 10 days--however, since i've had a burning urge to go to India for so long, I decided to buy more time. So, I extended my ticket until November 20th, got my shots and I was ready to go to India except one thing stood in my way. A visa. A visa that would take up to 2 weeks to 2 months (the details are frustrating) for approval--I couldn't risk getting a ticket without a visa (no Jewish father would approve of this)--so, I took it as a sign and decided not to go. Instead, I thought I'd just go home and surprise my family.
A couple days before I was about to change my flight I learned that Alexis had relapsed and any inclination I had to leave, dissipated immediately. I knew I had to and wanted to be in one place, and that was here. Israel.
To be here with Alexis and Debbie and now, most recently Rick, was b'sheret (meant to be). To not only be able to help ease their transition into Israeli culture--hummus, Hebrew and currency, help them navigate around the city and simply just be here is what was meant to be.
The Wronzberg's are a strong family and although I know the road ahead will inevitably be rocky and what not, I'm happy to be in the car with them. I'm simply happy to be here-- happy to contribute and mostly honored to be around someone as special as Alexis, who, despite all odds is fighting and fighting fiercely with a huge smile on her face.
I wasn't even suppose to be in Israel. In fact, the only real reason why I came here was because one of my best friends decided to move her February Toronto wedding to August in Israel. I was only suppose to stay for 3 weeks.
I extended my trip for an extra 10 days--however, since i've had a burning urge to go to India for so long, I decided to buy more time. So, I extended my ticket until November 20th, got my shots and I was ready to go to India except one thing stood in my way. A visa. A visa that would take up to 2 weeks to 2 months (the details are frustrating) for approval--I couldn't risk getting a ticket without a visa (no Jewish father would approve of this)--so, I took it as a sign and decided not to go. Instead, I thought I'd just go home and surprise my family.
A couple days before I was about to change my flight I learned that Alexis had relapsed and any inclination I had to leave, dissipated immediately. I knew I had to and wanted to be in one place, and that was here. Israel.
To be here with Alexis and Debbie and now, most recently Rick, was b'sheret (meant to be). To not only be able to help ease their transition into Israeli culture--hummus, Hebrew and currency, help them navigate around the city and simply just be here is what was meant to be.
The Wronzberg's are a strong family and although I know the road ahead will inevitably be rocky and what not, I'm happy to be in the car with them. I'm simply happy to be here-- happy to contribute and mostly honored to be around someone as special as Alexis, who, despite all odds is fighting and fighting fiercely with a huge smile on her face.
From my journal...
From my journal...
"those little killer cells are downstairs getting ready--preparing to be transplanted into Alexis' body--little pac-man heads with shark teeth, going in and eating the cancer away--I pray. But back to Debbie. Her delirium post wake up was hilarious--but in all seriousness, every minute, Debbie asked, "did you take enough? how much did you get? was it four pounds of marrow?..." She wanted the assurance--needed the assurance.
She later said to me while we were sitting in the clinics grandiose nursing room, swallowing the last bit of her Aroma egg sandwich, "I just want to make sure she gets enough." She said it with such confidence and emotion--tears brewing in her beautiful green/blue eyes--wearing nothing but a hospital gown and a pair of TNA pants--she wanted me to know, in that moment, how badly she wanted this to work. She wanted me to know, how badly, as a mother she wanted to be able to provide her daughter with what we hope and pray will keep Alexis' body cancer free.
Debbie truly is amazing. Has been with Alexis every step of the way--flying to another part of the world to fight for her daughters life--and now for the first time, she literally has a hand in saving Alexis' life. She said to me, in one way or another, that she gave her blood first (at birth), then the donor from the last transplant and now she is giving Alexis her blood again. Full circle as she calls it. Putting back what she gave Alexis in the first place.
Now the tug o war inside Alexis' body begins...and though the smile on her face is larger than normal and the glistening in her eyes is brighter, we know, we all know, that in life, no matter who you are, you never know what tomorrow brings.
"those little killer cells are downstairs getting ready--preparing to be transplanted into Alexis' body--little pac-man heads with shark teeth, going in and eating the cancer away--I pray. But back to Debbie. Her delirium post wake up was hilarious--but in all seriousness, every minute, Debbie asked, "did you take enough? how much did you get? was it four pounds of marrow?..." She wanted the assurance--needed the assurance.
She later said to me while we were sitting in the clinics grandiose nursing room, swallowing the last bit of her Aroma egg sandwich, "I just want to make sure she gets enough." She said it with such confidence and emotion--tears brewing in her beautiful green/blue eyes--wearing nothing but a hospital gown and a pair of TNA pants--she wanted me to know, in that moment, how badly she wanted this to work. She wanted me to know, how badly, as a mother she wanted to be able to provide her daughter with what we hope and pray will keep Alexis' body cancer free.
Debbie truly is amazing. Has been with Alexis every step of the way--flying to another part of the world to fight for her daughters life--and now for the first time, she literally has a hand in saving Alexis' life. She said to me, in one way or another, that she gave her blood first (at birth), then the donor from the last transplant and now she is giving Alexis her blood again. Full circle as she calls it. Putting back what she gave Alexis in the first place.
Now the tug o war inside Alexis' body begins...and though the smile on her face is larger than normal and the glistening in her eyes is brighter, we know, we all know, that in life, no matter who you are, you never know what tomorrow brings.
it's like giving birth for the second time...
Debbie came to the hospital this morning at 7am so that the doctors could drain just enough of her blood and bone marrow for Alexis. 1.2 liters later.
By the time Alexis and I had arrived at the clinic, she was coming off the anesthetic. To say the least, Debbie was our early morning entertainment--laughter, smiles and sunshine filled the room making for a beautiful way to start the day. The energy in the room was one of excitement and bravery--Debbie was about to give back to Alexis what she had given her 27 years ago.
That alone is an experience that I am having trouble describing. The way I see it, it's as if Debbie was giving birth to Alexis again.or perhaps re-birth. Time can only tell.
Check out my blog entry, "From my journal"...
By the time Alexis and I had arrived at the clinic, she was coming off the anesthetic. To say the least, Debbie was our early morning entertainment--laughter, smiles and sunshine filled the room making for a beautiful way to start the day. The energy in the room was one of excitement and bravery--Debbie was about to give back to Alexis what she had given her 27 years ago.
That alone is an experience that I am having trouble describing. The way I see it, it's as if Debbie was giving birth to Alexis again.or perhaps re-birth. Time can only tell.
Check out my blog entry, "From my journal"...
koach (strength in hebrew)
We're dealing with a strong team here--Debbie nor Alexis let anything stand in their way. Forget the doom and gloom or the what "ifs"--these two are focused on one thing-- getting Alexis home.
Forget the feel bad for me's or the relentless questioning of whether or not this treatment will work. In the meantime, they are enjoying life--enjoying being in Israel -- and before the treatments begin, Alexis was offered to ride in a mini airplane, called a moony...
more to come...
Forget the feel bad for me's or the relentless questioning of whether or not this treatment will work. In the meantime, they are enjoying life--enjoying being in Israel -- and before the treatments begin, Alexis was offered to ride in a mini airplane, called a moony...
more to come...
we're in a hurry, but not in a rush...
At 10:45pm, Alexis and Debbie walked through the arrival gate at Ben Gurion airport here in Israel. I immediately ran over to greet them with a full embrace and without dry eyes. A certain ease and peacefulness came over them--and they seemed be be comforted by a familiar face and were especially comforted by the fact they were on Israeli soil.
Overwhelmed by the outpouring of support in Canada, back home, by friends, family and strangers and by the intensity of the reality of being here, I sensed a lot of relief from both of them once they arrived.
Once we got all the bags in the taxi and headed towards the centre of Tel viv--their hope was even more realized and even more so after meeting with the doctors.
The journey for Alexis had begun and as her nurse put it so gently, “we are in a hurray but not in a rush.”
The way the doctors responded to Alexis was exactly the type of medicine that she really needed--one that she came so far to realize even more--a dose of hope.
It’s hard not to think of the connection between hope and Israel, as the nations anthem in its literal translation means Hope, or, in hebrew, Hatikva--which, in a way, makes it even more meaningful that she is here.
In addition, one of the doctors face lit up after Alexis shared with him how well her body responded after her last transplant. The doctors entire aura eased up--and, the climate and energy of the room suddenly became one of hope and optimism.
Alexis’ spirit, fight and beautiful smile remain strong and vibrant as she begins her journey here in Israel.
As difficult of a time this is-- and is perhaps suppose to be, we are remaining positive and enjoying our time together. Learning a lot from one another, consoling each other and venting--being real--no bullshit--there’s no time for bullshit--not today, tomorrow or yesterday.
Overwhelmed by the outpouring of support in Canada, back home, by friends, family and strangers and by the intensity of the reality of being here, I sensed a lot of relief from both of them once they arrived.
Once we got all the bags in the taxi and headed towards the centre of Tel viv--their hope was even more realized and even more so after meeting with the doctors.
The journey for Alexis had begun and as her nurse put it so gently, “we are in a hurray but not in a rush.”
The way the doctors responded to Alexis was exactly the type of medicine that she really needed--one that she came so far to realize even more--a dose of hope.
It’s hard not to think of the connection between hope and Israel, as the nations anthem in its literal translation means Hope, or, in hebrew, Hatikva--which, in a way, makes it even more meaningful that she is here.
In addition, one of the doctors face lit up after Alexis shared with him how well her body responded after her last transplant. The doctors entire aura eased up--and, the climate and energy of the room suddenly became one of hope and optimism.
Alexis’ spirit, fight and beautiful smile remain strong and vibrant as she begins her journey here in Israel.
As difficult of a time this is-- and is perhaps suppose to be, we are remaining positive and enjoying our time together. Learning a lot from one another, consoling each other and venting--being real--no bullshit--there’s no time for bullshit--not today, tomorrow or yesterday.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)