a tree for you

After Poland, like all March of the Living trips we traveled to Israel. I was dreading going back there--first time for everything--most don't dread going to Israel. But i did. I just didn't want to have to deal with the emotions of going back to a place that I had left you--smiling and hopeful. But, alas, this is part of my gig and as soon as my feet touched the ground in Israel it hit me that you weren't there.

I spent months from the time I knew I was heading for Israel attempting and in some ways pretending to prepare my emotions for what was going to come. This was not the thing you could write a script for though. You never know how you will react before you get somewhere--so I didn't prepare. I just continued missing you, naturally.

Upon arrival in Israel, our group headed directly to the north to go tree planting. I couldn't picture anything more fitting. My participants all planted trees to mark the Jewish presence in the land of Israel, and I planted one for you--and your presence in the land of Israel. I know that a lot of you is still in Israel--eating a huge caramel decadent pie, enjoying a delicious salad at Goocha that I had you drooling over in a mere description and just walking along the look out staring at the sea like we did that one shabbat.

Neshama's as strong as yours definitely need to be bound up and protected in a land like Israel--and I know a country like this, one you loved so dearly, will protect you and keep your precious neshama safe. And now, there is a tree in Israel for you that I will forever go and visit each time i go.

This is a tree for you.