flowing with the emotions

The general sequence of conversation is something like this:
"I never knew her but I feel for you, and if i feel this way, then i don't know how you're coping. I can't imagine how her parents are coping, her sister."

I don't generally know how to answer this because a way a person feels changes every second, every moment and I can't speak for anyone but myself right now. Of course people can appear better than they are; and what goes on behind closed doors is between an individual and most likely a pillow case.

It's hard to ask me how they are "coping" because i don't really go by the term. I more so go by moving through the waves of emotions. I've said that before i think. Memories can pop in out at any moment and take you for a spin, a roller coaster ride, that never seems like it will end. then there is the question of guilt, should we be having a good time, enjoying, laughing. There is no direct answer. The only thing I can see, personally, is that circumstances like this, the only way, for me at least, is to ride the emotional wave. When a big wave comes crashing, feel that crash. When there is ease at the tide, go with it. Let it happen. Let the emotions guide you, not hinder you. Let them continue your flow. and as morbid as it might seem, go with it, enjoy it. Enjoy each emotion. Embrace the saddnes and the happiness. To understand saddness is to really understand and embrace happiness (vice versa).